
Sister Marilyn Jean Graf, MM
Born: February 1, 1927
Entered: September 2, 1956
Died: December 20, 2024
We are gathered this morning to celebrate the life of Sister Marilyn Jean Graf who slipped quietly into eternal life on December 20, 2024 at 10:45 P.M. She possesses at last the fullness of life for which in faith she had been longing these past few months with all her heart. Sister Marilyn Jean was 97 years old and had been a Maryknoll Sister for 68 years. Her self-gift has not stopped with death. She has donated her body to science.
Jean Rita Graf was born on February 1, 1927, in Joliet, Illinois, the firstborn of two daughters to Aloysius Graf and Margaret Passinger Graf. Her younger sister Joan has predeceased her. She is survived by her three nephews, Michael, Paul, and Thomas Pejsa.
After graduating from St Francis Academy in Joliet, IL in 1944, Jean immediately got a job as a secretary. In 1946, she honed her skills in a three-month course at Field Business School at Oak Park, IL and continued as a private secretary until the day she decided to become a Maryknoll Sister, a story in itself. I quote in part her letter to Maryknoll on September 17, 1955. “Dear Sister, I would like to serve God in the mission field. I observed your nuns on Oahu, Hawaii and in New York City, but I had not the courage to approach them. I am now asking for an interview.”
And again, on March 5, 1956, “Dear Sister Mary Paul, I am not a wishy-washy person, and although I still have doubts, I would like to make application to be accepted at Maryknoll. It will be real hard cutting off my ties, but I do want to do something hard for a change – and I’ll be doing it – this giving up – for my Lord, if it is feasible for a 29-year-old to be considered.” And that was it. Jean entered at Maryknoll, New York on September 2, 1956. Nine months later, on June 24, 1957, at the Reception ceremony she received the name Sister Marilyn Jean and kept this name even after Vatican II when many sisters returned to their baptismal names. She evidently felt hers was just right.
She pronounced her First Vows on June 24, 1959 at Maryknoll, New York and her Final Vows on June 24, 1965 at Colegio Monte Maria in Guatemala. After First Profession, Sister Marilyn Jean’s secretarial skills were immediately put to use for one year in Central Administration here at the Maryknoll Sisters Center. As proficient a secretary as she was, when the assignments came out in 1960, she was on the list for the Mexico-Guatemala Region, specifically for Colegio Monte Maria where she taught commercial subjects until October 1965. Marilyn Jean was not a teacher, but she did what she was asked to do even if she did not like it or felt inadequate to the task.
Therefore, in 1965, when Marilyn Jean was asked if she would be willing to serve in an office at the Maryknoll Society, she leaped at the opportunity. She always said yes and did well at whatever she was asked, but perhaps in retrospect, she was not quite prepared for her next assignment in 1969 to Mindszenty High School on the island of Koror, Palau, then part of Philippine Region. She was to teach five classes daily of English and religion plus commercial subjects besides sharing in housework and cooking. After three years, Marilyn Jean realized that she needed to speak up and tell her superiors that she was involved in education for which she was not qualified, and that frankly, she liked office work much better! Additionally, a decision had already been made to close that house and thus it was an opportune time to ask for another assignment.
Coinciding with this decision in 1973, a vacancy in the Maryknoll Society secretariat opened up and she was once again assigned there until 1978. Her five years of service earned her this accolade from Fr. McIntire: “Un million de gracias for your superb work and services in the Council secretariat – grateful for your spirit and calmness and dedication amid all the hard work that the Council Secretariat tries to accomplish.”
Although it was clear Marilyn Jean was happier as a secretary, the need for a good teacher of commercial subjects was great and she was destined to return to Colegio Monte Maria in Guatemala to teach once again and to serve also as homeroom teacher for the junior class from 1979-1988. That she would spend nine more years of her life in teaching attests to the graciousness with which she accepted all that was asked of her. Sisters loved living with her. They said that she noticed the needs of others and quietly took care of them. She was a joy in community. In February 1989, Marilyn Jean asked for Family Leave to care for her ailing mother who died in August of that same year.
Following the General Assembly of 1990 and the change of administration, Marilyn Jean was happy to accept the offer to manage the secretariat. In this capacity, she typed many letters and fortuitously, never one to miss an opportunity, she got herself assigned to Udon Thani in Thailand. Here is how that happened. The Central Governing Board had received a request from Bishop George Yod Phimphisan, C.SS.R. who wanted to have a Maryknoll Sister for a secretary. Having no one to send, a CGB Member had drafted a letter of regret but when Sister Marilyn Jean typed it, she simultaneously attached a note asking if she could be considered for the position. She went on to serve Bishop George and his diocese for eleven years from 1993-2004. In a visit to her mission, two CGB members saw how much Bishop George depended on her for his English correspondence, but they only realized the extent of his reliance when they heard the steady stream of incoming faxes piling up on the floor as they were talking with him.
When she returned from Thailand, Marilyn Jean served the Leadership Team with her extraordinary executive secretarial skills from 2005-2007 following, which she spent three years in Monrovia, California in semi-retirement where she served as a coordinating team member from 2007-2010. The Sisters remember how she could speak up without offending, always contributing to community harmony. Marilyn Jean was outspoken, but never unkind.
In 2014, she returned to the Center and joined the Chi Rho Community, but continued to serve the Congregational Leadership Team in the Secretariat until she definitively retired in December of 2020.
All through her years of service to the Leadership Teams and continuing afterwards into her 95th year, Marilyn Jean was an avid Bridge player – a really good one. Those who played with her suspected she had a degree in that too, but in fact, she was just plain smart. She also planned her days around whatever Chicago sport team was playing – she never missed a game! And, one more joy in her life was fishing with her sister Joan – an unlikely picture, but nevertheless real, and a mental image we can cherish.
Marilyn Jean herself asked to transfer to the Eden Community when she felt her health seriously declining. As the end approached, she was remarkable, exuding peace to all who visited her. She maintained her gracious good humor and her common sense to the very end.
In the center of her Christmas letter in 1996, Marilyn Jean had inserted a little prayer that resounds in our hearts: “May the One who comes, Come again in us. Love made visible to All!”
We welcome Fr. David LaBuda, MM who will preside this Memorial liturgy.